Pick o' the Day: An Example of Things I Think About While I'm Driving

So I’m cruising into Austin on the fabulous Manor Expressway that for a toll of a little over two dollars allows me to skip past at least eight traffic lights all the way to I-35 and I look to my right and see an ambulance with all its lights flashing traveling parallel to me on the frontage road and I realize that I’ve never seen an ambulance on the Expressway and it hits me that sumbich! those besterds are too cheap to pay the toll and are taking the frontage road and having to go through all those lights and putting everyone in danger and the poor sumbich having the heart attack inside the ambulance thinks they’re doing everything they can to get him to the emergency room in a timely manner and all they have to do is pull onto the Expressway and have a clear shot all the way to Brackenridge but instead they’re sticking to the frontage road and saving a whole two and a half bucks even though the last time they gave me a ride for a severe anxiety attack they did their very best to bump it up to a major heart attack by presenting me with a bill for over a thousand dollars for that very same ride and now I realize that the next time I need an ambulance ride I’ll have to remember to have at least two and a half bucks in my pocket to give to the driver and tell him to take the Expressway, the cheap besterds!